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| Blogs > 40Deuce > Sherry Stringfield's ass in 93 |
Wow , post one picture of your hairy ass and people turn on you
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Wow , post one picture of your hairy ass and people turn on you "Some girls try it, and go on a diet Then they worry cause they's too fat Who wants to ride on an ironing board? That ain't no fun I tried me one." — Frank Zappa, "S.E.X."  I found out today this dude is a robot created by Skynet and sent back in time to fuck all women , presumably all straight women . He's definitely got a rockin' bod and his face is okay , but he doesn't seem like megasexy to me all things considered . I mean I'd do him , but what does that really mean in the final analysis ? Quick , name a big time actress with large breasts ! Probably you did , but the idea is supposed to be that there aren't (m)any ? I was listening to a podcast and this actress said matter of factly that slim actresses with large breasts usually can't get work because the industry considers anything above a C to be "huge" and will only cast her as eye candy . Do we buy that ? Jennifer Love of course , ScarJo's got some pretty healthy knockers on her as did what's her name , the chick who was in Tomb Raider . And Salma Hayek, my god Semla Hayek! I guess maybe the issue is what is considered large ? C IS large right ? Bah , what do I know from boobs ? I went to a yoga class today so I could be told all the things I was doing wrong . I mean since I started doing yoga I can lift my left arm above my shoulder again , which is nice , but I'm sure it could be better . I didn't really learn anything , but I did see a lady with the biggest yoga mat ever . No joke it was only slightly smaller than a full sized mattress . if this yoga mat was tits it would be a G easily . When the class was over and she rolled it up and had it under her arm it looked like a tree stump . So that was cool . I don't think knowing what bukkake is necessarily makes you a freak , but I feel using the term in casual conversation probably does . The other day , AT work a dude was telling a story about whatever dumb thing he was talking about and he said "ketchup was dripping all on his face , it was like a bukkake video" . I know it doesn't seem like it but we're trying to have a society here dude . Keep that stuff under a tight heavy lid . However I will say that today everyone have giving me the crookeye because I knew what the glim-dropper is . Its an old timey confidence scheme . I knew about it from books and the movie Zombieland but since everyone was looking at me askance anyway I said that when I was younger I used to scam people all the time . I don't know why anyone would believe it since you need confidence to be a confidence man , but they fell for it like the Spanish prisoner . Speaking of work , I notice that a panel had fallen off the bigger bosses cube wall and that there was no metal paneling behind it . Many a year ago one of my temp jobs was building cubes in new offices and all the ones I put together had thin metal sheets on the inside . I guess I assumed they were all like that . Sidenote that was one of the few temp assignments I kind of liked . I was actually doing something , I was alone , it was cool . Anyway , since the cubes didn't have much holding them together I resolved to smash through one like the Kool-Aid man , or try anyway . It had to be a manager cube because the analyst cubes have the desks built into the walls and the peons don't get cubes - they're just packed in like cattle at a feedlot . And I had to find one without the big cabinet that most managers have opposite their desk because it sits against the wall and would cause issues . I eventually found a likely candidate and ran at it will full speed (which isn't much honestly) and smashed it to smithereens like Martina Navratilova smashed an overhead volley . And then I sat in the wreckage laughing hysterically . So while it sucks that my job makes me crazy enough to smash through walls like the Kool-Aid I guess the upside is that its basically impossible to get fired . Sadly I could not put the cube back together - it was way different than the ones I used to work with .  Now some dumb stuff about wrestling . In the late 90's wrestling had a huge spike in popularity , mostly due to Stone Cold Steve Austin and the Rock . Unsurprisingly this period when wrestling was "mainstream" was when I stopped watching it for a while . Oh 40 , always the contrarian . Anyway , the third and admittedly much less important person who was responsible for this explosion of popularity was Sable .  Clearly she would never get cast in Hollywood . She was the most masturbated to woman for a few years there . I hated her because while she was certainly hot she had a mega-annoying high pitched voice which is the #1 boner killer for me and she wasn't a great wrestler but since she was the masturbatory fantasy she always went over . In that way she was exactly like the Rock and Austin , her in ring work was mediocre at best but the people liked her so that was that . She left wrestling at the height of her popularity to do . . . something and then she came back a couple of years later . And inexplicably the fans shit all over her . It was weird . She was still hot and that's all she ever had going . It just goes to show the fickleness of wrestling people . You never really know what they're going to do . In retrospect I guess I was too hard on her . Honestly she probably did more in the ring than the Rock (punch , kick , punch , kick , people's elbow , Rock Bottom) or Austin (punch , kick , punch , kick , flying dick to the face , Stunner) did at that time . And the only women she had to work with were Luna Vachon and Jacqueline mostly - and clearly neither of them were going to be the top so of course she went over all the time . On the other hand she married Brock Lesner so fuck her . In other news I forgot how much of a douche I am when I'm on match . I read all these profiles and they'll say "I funny" and I think "I doubt it" or "I'm really easy to be around" and I think "says who ?" or "I'm smart" and I think "pfft smart people don't brag about how smart they are unless they're jerks" . There's really no pleasing me . As you all know a dude tried to Bill Cosby me at a renaissance fair but I was reminded today of one of my cherished childhood memories that was inspired by a ren-fair (if I can coin a term , oh , I can't ? Sorry) At one renaissance fair my buddies and all I bought these fake swords that were basically just PVC pipe with some padding on them duct taped on and we ran around wailing on each other - good clean American fun . Over time they all broke apart so we did the only thing preteen boys could do - we took some broomsticks , wrapped them in towels and figured "this won't hurt" and anyway we went . Spoiler alert , it DID hurt . Oh man , there was so much blood ! I don't even consider myself to have been a rough and tumble kind of but the today seem so much wussier than we were back then . We used to have crab apple wars all the time and we'd zing those things at each other as hard as we could - and that shit hurt boy . I remember we used to pile up empty boxes all the time and just run into them - so one time we thought it would be funny to fill the boxes with rocks and get Spare Rib to run into them . Oh the laughter , oh the concussion ! And this was nothing compared to what the other did . In conclusion you know who else has some real knockers on her ? Virginia Hey . Not that she was a big star , just saying . Putting first by putting employees first, immediately after prioritizing fiscal responsibilities and leveraging profitability towards exceeding by empowering our employees to put (and themselves) first, in a diverse and respectful environment of only those that come first, first. |
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I didn't think that was YOUR ass. Now do I have to turn on you as well? I don't think C is considered big anymore, not in these days of boob enhancements. Probably more "average".   
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I enjoyed following the twists, turns and dark alleys of your mind here. Which sent me to read your profile. You are right, sir. If a profile says, "I'm funny," it's rarely true. I appreciate that you actually score "Fine" and "Adequate" as a lover. That did actually cause me to, err, Laugh Out Loud. Yes, I actually did. I didn't just write LOL so that you'd know I got the joke. Or in case you missed that I intended to be funny. Now, what's up with your extra spaces before " ." and " ?" ????
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