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Discreet Glossary Needed
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Discreet Glossary Needed Dear Friends For the benefit of newbies and oldies on these sites we need a glossary, giving both meanings of any words which can be used to mean two things. Many words have both standard and innuendo or modern meanings. As a result the writer may mean one thing, but half the readership will understand another. To give a few examples, starting with those which most people know, ending with those which nobody knows : 1 Wicked: a) horrid, harmful, malicious and unacceptable. b) delightful, unexpected, clever, as in wicked sense of humour. 2 Gay: a) In poetry happy; b) homosexual. 3 Goddess: a) Worshipped by Romans, Greeks; b) Icon, popular, desirable; c) Beautifully groomed, sexy and intelligent and rich Dominatrix, worshipped by admirers who are lower in status and cannot be permitted sexual relations but give her praise and presents. 4 Discreet relationship: a) Not revealed to anybody except the couple concerned. b) Not revealed to the wife of the male advertiser. c) My family mustn't know or have my phone number. But I don't care how many messages containing four-letter words and erotic suggestions I leave on your answering machine to be heard by all and sundry. d) Photos and intimate details all over the net, but not revealed to family and colleagues. Unless they are on the net, too. Which they probably are. In fact we know they are. Because they have said so. Also they shut the door when they start. They switch off the computer in a hurry when we walk in unexpectedly. e) You can't phone or visit me. But at first meeting I am happy to kiss you in the high street. I'll fondle you and we'll be on the CCTV cameras in the bus station. Also outside the bank, in the newsagent and just about everywhere else. f) I won't bring out my sex toys in the restaurant. But I'll sit in the car with the lights on and show them to you in the high street as people walk past. Why are you so nervous. Okay, are you happy now? We're parked outside the house of people who are looking through binoculars and videoing us worried that we might be burglars. g) We won't go to each other's homes on a first meeting. I won't tell you what I've got to show in the pub. No, it's not a bunch of flowers. Nor a box of chocolates. Nor a sterling silver bracelet costing four dollars from a catalogue shop to make you feel you are my girlfriend and under an obligation. But I will show you my sex toys in the pub so that it can be recorded on their video. h) I keep my messages on password protected internet sites. But will happily send erotic messages to your workplace. i) I will not show a picture of my face. But here is a complete collection of pictures of my private parts, resting, erect, and in action. j) I forgot - here are my buttocks. And here's a look inside. But don't show these pictures to anybody else. I only send them secretly to the five hundred people I write to daily. k) I do not show my face on the net. I show the genitals of every woman I meet. l) Let's be furtive. I shall keep looking over my shoulder when talking to you in a restaurant to be sure nobody realizes what's going on. m) Whenever I say anything rude I shall look round at people at the next table and stage whisper. When they go quiet I shall say loudly, NOBODY HEARD! NOBODY'S LISTENING! n) I shall write emails to you at work and leave messages on your answering machine which say nothing except NOBODY WILL EVER GET TO HEAR OF THIS. YOU MUST NOT TELL ANYBODY! THIS COULD RUIN YOUR REPUTATION! IT WILL RUIN MINE! o) My wife must not hear of this. She watches my every move. She knows me too well. p) How could my wife possibly know? I live in the capital. I go to orgies in every other city in the world. My car is full of sex toys and kits. I have sex with every woman in the world except my wife. Since she is not having sex with me she cannot be having sex with anybody. Why do you say that if I don't have sex with my spouse, but see other people, she could be doing the same? I don't see the logic of it. I never thought of that. You are too smart for me. q) I'll take you anywhere. But you must never meet my wife. Here's a list of places we can't go. Just about everywhere except your place. I'll park around the corner. Then I'll walk up your drive, setting off the security lights to illuminate me, drunk, shouting NOBODY SAW US! r) You must meet my wife. You are so like her. You would adore her. She would adore you. Just don't ever mention that you were in Paris, or any other city in the world in case she guesses we were there together. In fact, just let me do all the talking. I can handle anything. I love handling you. Why aren't you getting orgasmic? Everybody else would be orgasmic by now. I have testimonials from 500 women. Including my girlfriend the who has never seen anything like me and she sees a hundred men a week. None of the women I meet has any kind of disease. I insist they tell me about every other man they've met. One can't be too careful. Why does it put you off, listening to me talking about my wife, when I'm trying to excite you? s) I can't visit you because I'm babysitting. But it's okay at my place because my wife is away, and nobody is at home except the and the parrot. And the neighbours popping in. t) You can't visit my place. But I can arrive when you are working. I don't care if your family come home. I don't care if your neighbours walk in. Adds to the fun, doesn't it! u) My wife must never know. But I want you to wear no knickers in the restaurant. And have sex in the local car park. It's a real buzz. Especially dodging journalists from the local paper. One of them's the partner of my ex-girlfriend who was so jealous. I love annoying her. And I sleep with her once in a while to annoy him. I've slept with him too. If he puts pictures of you and me on the front page of his rag, I'll send pictures of him to the rival newspaper. My brother who's a photographer always takes pictures. And he likes to join in. I hope you're not jealous. v) We will have orgies with complete strangers in car parks. My wife is quite happy about this. She is bisexual. Would you like to meet her? I can also do parties at the local disco for gang-bangs, if that appeals. Don't worry about the police. The police know me. You can phone me at the office. Or come over. I love sex at the office. My secretary is in this too. She's bisexual. You must meet her. You can be as discreet as you like. No need to tell your husband. I quite understand. w) I am very discreet. I won't meet you in public. I'll roar up to your house in my green custom build car, playing loud music, and toot my horn. Then I'll pull into your driveway, alongside the neighbour's car. x) I'll stay parked on your drive for three days, so that the neighbours ask: 'Who's the guy with the green car, the one with yellow suede shoes and the red tie? He's a character! Adds fun to the street. 'Pity we never saw him again. Did the police ever catch the person who scratched his car? He was pretty annoyed, wasn't he? You could hear him swearing right down the road.' y) They might also ask: 'What happened to the man with the gold rings and silver Rolls Royce? He was here a lot, wasn't he? Oh, he died? Pity. It always cheered us up when he came to visit. We used to look out for him. Our knew he was coming before we did. 'He was such a regular. You could set your watch by him. He arrived Fridays at ten. And left Mondays at nine. Some people thought he lived here. 'And what happened to the man with the cadillac and the cowboy hat who borrowed our jump-leads to start his car? He told us not to say anything to your husband. 'Such a sense of humour. Your husband thought that was such a laugh. He told us not to tell you we'd told him. Are you getting divorced?' z) I won't visit you. You won't visit me. But I love the cam so take all your clothes off. Follow my directions. Display yourself. Masturbate. Have orgasms. This is very private, just for me. And my friends. Can't imagine how the previous film I shot got all over the net. Okay, this time wear a mask. Yes, if I were you, I'd move out of the background those bills and envelopes showing your address, and the family photos, and your work uniform with the company logo. You should have done that last time! If members using the word discreet would kindly add the letter indicating their idea of discreet, we could know what we are in for. Times have changed. Discreet doesn't mean what it used to mean. -ends- Please send your additional suggestions. 'Elizabeth'[   |
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Thank you so much, 'Shy'. (Not too shy to create 2399 posts - maybe we 'posters' don't get enough attention at home.) When I put up a post I think, has anybody read it? If they don't say anything, I wonder, maybe they were expecting something else, or merely clicked on it by mistake, the blog equivalent of a wrong number. I keep checking back. It's wonderful to know somebody enjoyed it. Really appreciate your remark and the cute little smilies. 'Elizabeth'[
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Dear I Need It Yes, good to remind me and everybody about discreet and discrete. Spelling is a whole separate topic. Don't get me started on that! I think I mentioned it in another blog.I'll do a new one soon. Great to hear from you again. You are always so bright and breezy. PS Canada? Loved Niagara, both sides. Nature's orgasm, non-stop. 'Elizabeth'[
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