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Blogs > OneStrangeBeast > The Beast Burrow

Safety precautions for women - Edition  

OneStrangeBeast 52M  
2040 posts
6/7/2013 2:03 pm

Last Read:
6/11/2013 4:35 pm
Safety precautions for women - Edition
I don't normally go in for cutting and pasting things I didn't write or draw myself, but this deserves to be shared. I couldn't have done it better myself.
AmericanBaronin 59F   
12250 posts
6/7/2013 3:12 pm

 Flip Side:

Atomic Mass: varies highly {all the way from lump somewhere to good gawd get out of my way don't you have something else to do}

Physical Properties: Body surface normally covered with various densities of hair {if not, please see stats on "androgynous" or "gay" or "metrosexual"}
Can boil for no reason {see "jealousy" or "alpha male"}; can freeze for no reason {see "male: not paying attention" or "jealousy"}
Found in various grades, from virgin material, common ore, 'everyday' grade, to the type that can be 'changed' from iron to gold

Chemical Properties: Reacts well with electronic uses, fast cars, loose females, sports, and alcoholic beverages {without umbrellas or fruit}
Has been known to explode spontaneously for no reason {see: electronics, fast cars, loose females, sports, alcoholic beverages, and in-laws when 'activated'}

Common Use: opening stuck jars, yardwork, wearing out loungers/sofas, providing body heat, providing examples of bad examples to offspring, providing the occasional orgasm, providing continual amazement/consternation/amusement

Hazards: Has extremely bad gaseous state{s}, but overall usually advisable to have several as any single one does not seem to be all that is required for various reasons


OneStrangeBeast replies on 6/7/2013 3:57 pm:
It doesn't count. You didn't put it in the form of a Material Safety Data Sheet. OSHA will not approve.

AmericanBaronin 59F   
12250 posts
6/7/2013 5:21 pm

 OSHA doesn't approve of the phrase "bite me, big boy" either, what was your point?


OneStrangeBeast replies on 6/7/2013 5:53 pm:
OSHA would most certainly approve of that phrase if it was necessary to protect health or life.

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