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Engineering Design Summary M & F Variants
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Engineering Design Summary M & F Variants Engineering Design Summary M & F Variants Humans are produced in two variants: the 'F' variant, which is essentially a self contained support unit for an incubator module to procreate and disseminate the species; and, the 'M' variant, a terrestrial transport unit for an insemination module. Save for differences associated with the primary function of each variant, the two variants are outwardly similar in appearance, noting that there is a significant range of cosmetic variation and adaptation with each variant, depending on origin of manufacture and service history. The greatest difference occurs in the command system employed in each variant. This creates significant differences in operational performance and characteristics. The M variant uses a simple electro-neural system. Command functions are shared between command centres; the heads, of which there are two. The first of these is located on the highest point of the variant, just behind the visual sensory unit and between the two elements of the audio sensory unit. This combined sensory and command head is referred to as the cranium. The second head is located at the end of the insemination probe. The design philosophy is one of simplicity, spartan utility and basic logic. Command functions are divided between fulfilment of the primary mission of the insemination module and its operation on one hand, while the transport unit command module co-ordinates ancillary functions in support of the primary mission, movement, maintenance, logistics and target acquisition. The operating system has been found to perform with reproducible consistency over the life of the unit but this does not necessarily translate to operational reliability. There are many additional applications which can be loaded to enhance the performance of the basic operating system. These include but not limited to: romance, sensitivity, gifts, quality time, physical contact, affirmation, conversation, diary (important dates) and housekeeping. Applications are typically very memory intensive and the base memory allocation in this variant is restrictive. Memory constraints can limit the number and type of applications that can be loaded. It can also limit the reliability and performance of these applications. While enhanced memory upgrades are available in this variant, very few units come with this option. It is almost unheard of to find a unit of this variant that has sufficient memory to load all of the aforementioned applications and run them reliably at full capacity. M variant have been developed to run on a variety of fuels. Use of low grade malted fuels, such as 'Bud' can lead to regular misfires and a need to clear the fuel intake of gas build-ups. The effects of using these fuels can persist. Some M variants have also been observed to develop a looping in the maintenance routine of the mission module, resulting in excessive checks and adjustment of the mission equipment. A good kick in the mission equipment can remedy this problem but is not recommended as other responses this may<b> illicit </font></b>are not desirable. Consider this a safety warning. The greatest challenge in development has been to balance the command sharing functions between the two command centres. Many command sharing subroutines have been developed, employing different command protocols and hierarchies to prioritise key operational parameters and mission critical elements. Different routines have been found to perform exceptionally in specific operational environments but varying levels of general applicability. One subroutine is particularly noteworthy in that it tends to subordinate command function of the variant to the insemination module command centre. The degree to which this happens is related to the command memory Interface Quotient (IQ). In cases where the IQ is less than the length of the insemination unit (measured in inches) the capacity of the variant to perform secondary and tertiary tasks (that is, tasks not primary to the operation of the insemination module in completion of its mission) are severely compromised or inoperable. Any such unit should be returned to its place of manufacture and a replacement be sourced. The design concept for the F variant employs central command and control from the control centre located within the mission module and a secondary, subordinate processor for the transport unit and support systems. The control unit is endocrine based and employs a 'fuzzy logic' operating system integrated to the electro-neural system of the transport unit. While the endocrine based hardware performs superbly in control of the mission module, there are issues with the success of integrating it to control the transport vehicle, leading to erratic and unpredictable behaviour periodically, across a significant proportion of the total production line. Some commentators, referring to problems of integration to control the transport, have suggested that if the same system were used in the space programme, we would likely still be trying to reach the moon. Launch modules, instead of following their planned trajectory, would inexplicably divert to fashion destination like Milan, Paris or New York. Astronauts would be carried kicking and screaming to the space module. Safety harnesses would have central, '-proof' locks. Space suits would have extra long arms and buckles on the rear of the waist band. If Neil Armstrong did land on the moon, he wouldn't step from the lunar module to walk on the moon, he would have taken a running jump and they would still be looking for him. There would be an embargo on launches for a one week period in any four as the launch vehicle would likely imitate an ICBM and threaten the escalation of a nuclear war with the Soviet Union. In regard to the budget, there would be little to show for the billions of dollars spent except for one hell of a collection of designer shoes – costing billions of dollars. F variants are equipped with an extensive suite of embedded applications. As a consequence of this design strategy, however, space considerations have limited the number of ports available for additional applications and the memory capacity available for these. As an advantage derived from this strategy; however, add-in applications are able to access subroutines which have been embedded with the suite of standard applications. This allows them to augment their performance to a level much greater that their initial size would suggest. This is apparent in the application 'DIY' and particularly the function, 'decorate', within this. However, in the application, 'change a tyre', there are no applicable sub-routines within the embedded suite, so the application is limited in context by the memory size of the expansion port. A disadvantage of embedding applications is that the embedded applications cannot be modified or upgraded. There are a number of applications available for the M and F variants which would appear to have similar functions or might even have identical application titles. 'Cut Hair (Hair dresser)' and 'Cut Hair (Barber)', would appear to have similar function while 'DIY' applications are available for both variants. Under no circumstances should an application designed for one variant be loaded into the other variant. When cross-loaded, the performance of the application may be significantly enhanced; however, the application will interfere with operating system sub routines. Noticeably affected are the maintenance routines: 'groom', 'dress' and 'buy cloths' and the mission critical sub-routines of 'acquire target'. The effects describe are most noticeable when 'Cut Hair (Hair dresser)', 'DIY (F variant)' and 'Design (fashion)' are loaded into the M variant or 'Drive (truck)', 'Make/Manufacture (boilermaker)' or 'Change Tyre (M variant)' are loaded into the F variant. There are claims the multi-tasking function installed in the F variant is a significant functional enhancement over the M variant. It has been observed, however, that use of the multi-tasking routine can lead to degradation in performance of one or more of the tasks to which the routine is applied. There have been numerous observations where the applications: 'Text Message', 'Apply Makeup' and 'Do Hair' have been operated while also running the 'Drive Car' application. As a specific safety warning, multi-tasking must not be undertaken in conjunction with the application 'Drive Car', at any time that the vehicle has not pulled off the carriageway. To remove any doubt, multi tasking must not be performed if the vehicle is stopped but still on the carriageway, such as is in congested traffic. In conclusion, before operating your newly acquired M or F variant, it is essential that read and fully comprehend the operating instructions and safety warnings before commencing to operate the unit. "What!" you say. You didn't get an instruction manual with your unit? Oh ... Inspired in part by gottaring and her post Gimme a Dick and YOU be the Chick  |
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