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Blogs > bkadventure > Sexual adventures

Permission to play (the infamous Hall Pass)  

bkadventure 53M
9 posts
1/7/2019 3:42 pm
Permission to play (the infamous Hall Pass)
To those with jealousy issues, this can be difficult to understand... even if it is not you. So here is our attempt to explain our rational.

There are likely tons of reasons couples have a "Hall Pass" or one partner giving the other partner permission to have sex with other people. For some this concept comes about because one partner has a significantly higher sex drive than the other... and/or one partner has sexual desires (kinks) that the other partner just does not want to do for them. Sure, partners could deny the others feelings or one can work to abstain from their desires, but that can lead to all kinds of issues.

K and I feel it is best to have everything in the open which led us to our open relationship.

Sadly, over the years K's sexual appetite has dropped. This is due in part to our having a super high energy little one and K has started to enter menopause. In addition she is very introverted and putting her self out there for other couples puts a strain on her. She really enjoyed the idea of swinging and loved meeting/playing with the few couples we enjoyed. But, dealing with chatting with people and weeding out those she was not attracted to (mentally and physically), the details of arranging a date (and dealing with people who flake after she had an expectation), the awkwardness of the firsts (kiss, touch), etc... turned out t overwhelm her to the point that it was not as much fun for her.

NOTE: All this said, we are still looking for a couple or two that we can form a true friends with benefits relationship with... that has a focus on the friends part.

Through our years together, K and I have enjoyed many fun sexual times... sex in public spaces, masturbating each other at the movie theater, going to lifestyle resorts, going to nude beaches, and swinging (soft swap at this point). Then she slowly began losing her sex drive. This was tough for me as I have a very high sex drive and it seems to be getting stronger as I age. I also thoroughly enjoy trying new<b> sexual adventures. </font></b>I like the anticipation of meeting someone new, having that first kiss, and feeling that first touch. I also have many fantasies I would like to bring to life - I believe in enjoying life to the fullest and these things are part of that.

Fortunately K and I have an extremely strong relationship and we are able to openly talk about anything. So we began talking about what we could do to ensure we were both satisfied. I did not want her to have sex with me, or anyone else, if she was not into it. And she did not want me to try and calm my sex drive or desires. We both feel that if you attempt to change someones personality, it will only lead to bitterness. So after many long conversations and trying all sorts of things along the way, we eventually agreed that I could play alone any time I was on a business trip. This was fantastic as at the time I was traveling regularly, but then I changed jobs and the travel dried up. So we began talking again and she decided that she would be comfortable with me playing anytime so long as it does not interfere with family time.

So there you have it... a summary of how my "Hall Pass" came to be.

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