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My pussy.
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Posted:Nov 19, 2009 4:20 pm
Last Updated:May 23, 2024 5:12 pm
11309 Views
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A view of my pussy. My husband Jack took this and then licked me. Hugs and kisses, Amber.  
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The Economy Is So Bad.
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Posted:Oct 19, 2009 4:39 pm
Last Updated:May 23, 2024 5:12 pm
10863 Views
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 The Economy Is So Bad. 
The economy is so bad that I got a pre-declined credit card in the mail.
The economy is so bad that I ordered a burger at McDonalds and the behind the counter asked, "Can you afford fries with that?"
The economy is so bad that CEO's are now playing miniature golf.
The economy is so bad if the bank returns your check marked "Insufficient Funds," you call them and ask if they meant you or them.
The economy is so bad that Hot Wheels and Matchbox stocks are trading higher than GM.
The economy is so bad that McDonalds is selling the 1/4 ouncer.
The economy is so bad parents in Beverly Hills fired their nannies and learned their 's names.
The economy is so bad a truckload of Americans was caught sneaking into Mexico.
The economy is so bad that Dick Cheney took his stockbroker hunting.
The economy is so bad that Motel Six won't leave the light on anymore.
The economy is so bad that The Mafia is laying off judges.
The economy is so bad Exxon-Mobil laid off 25 Congressmen.
And finally...
The economy is so bad that Congress says they are looking into this Bernard Madoff scandal. Oh Great!! The guy who made $50 Billion disappear is being investigated by the people who made $1.5 Trillion disappear!
  by JACK.
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Jack's Fuck lesson.
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Posted:Sep 21, 2009 1:08 pm
Last Updated:May 23, 2024 5:12 pm
11071 Views
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Welcome to JACK's Class. Today we will be discussing the word Fuck.
Perhaps one of the most interesting and colorful words in the English language today is the word "fuck." It is the one magical word, just by its sound can describe pain, pleasure, hate and love. Fuck, as most words in the English language, takes its name from the German word "fricken," which means "to strike."
"Fuck" falls into many grammatical categories.
It can be used as a verb, both transitive (John fucked Mary) and intransitive (Mary was fucked by John).
It can be an active verb (John really fucks up) or a passive verb (Mary doesn't really give a fuck), an adverb (Mary is fucking interested in John), and a noun (Mary is a fine fuck).
It can be used as an adjective (Mary is fucking beautiful).
As you can see, there are not many words with the versatility of "fuck."
Besides its sexual connotation, this lovely word can be used to describe many situations:
a. Fraud I got fucked at the used car lot.
b. Dismay Oh, fuck it! Trouble I guess I'm fucked now.
c. Aggression Fuck you! Passive Fuck me.
d. Confusion What the fuck?
e. Difficulty I can't understand this fucking business.
f. Despair Fucked again. Apathy Who gives a fuck.
g. Incompetence He's all fucked up! Laziness He's a fuck off.
h. Displeasure What the fuck is going on here?
i. Ignorance Fuck if I know.
j. Defiance The fuck you can! Lost Where the fuck are we? k. Authority Shut the fuck up.
It can be used in descriptive anatomy - He's really a fucking asshole.
It can be used to tell time - It's five fucking thirty.
It can be used in business - How did I get this fucking job?
It can be a prediction - Oh, will I get fucked.
It can be maternal - as in "Mother Fucker."
It can be nautical - Fuck the Admiral.
It can be political - Fuck Reagan.
It can open the door to wonderful relationships - "Let's fuck."
It can be used just to enhance the meaning of a word - as in "Beautifuckingful" or "Terfuckingific."
The mind fairly boggles at the many creative uses. How can anyone be offended when you say "Fuck"? Use it in your daily speech, it adds to your prestige.
Today, tell someone "FUCK YOU."
SOME ADDED QUIPS:
Remember General Custer's famous last word:
"Where did all those fucking Indians come from?"
Also, the last words of the mayor of Hiroshima:
"What the fuck was that?"
And finally, the immortal words of the captain of the Titanic:
"Full speed ahead and fuck the icebergs!"
Hope you liked the class lesson today.
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Blow job fun.
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Posted:Aug 30, 2009 8:20 am
Last Updated:Feb 27, 2010 8:30 am
11317 Views
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I find it quite fun for me when giving a guy a blow job. The guys I give a blow job to, say it is quite fun for them to. Hugs and kisses Amber.
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Mankind's Most Important Discoveries.
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Posted:Aug 29, 2009 5:51 pm
Last Updated:May 23, 2024 5:12 pm
10574 Views
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Mankind's Most Important Discoveries.
Man discovered weapons, invented hunting.
Woman discovered hunting, invented furs.
Man discovered colors, invented painting.
Woman discovered painting, invented make-up.
Man discovered speech, invented conversation.
Woman discovered conversation, invented gossip.
Man discovered agriculture, invented food.
Woman discovered food, invented diet.
Man discovered friendship, invented love.
Woman discovered love, invented marriage.
Man discovered woman, invented sex.
Woman discovered sex, invented headache.
Man discovered trade, invented money.
Woman discovered money... Man was all screwed up after that.
If these don't make you laugh, nothing will, JACK.
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Strange Wisdom by Jack.
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Posted:Aug 29, 2009 5:09 pm
Last Updated:May 23, 2024 5:12 pm
10338 Views
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Strange Wisdom By JACK.
I was thinking about how a status symbol of today is those cell phones that everyone has clipped on. I can't afford one. So, I'm wearing my garage door opener.
You know, I spent a fortune on deodorant before I realized that people didn't like me anyway.
I was thinking that women should put pictures of missing husbands on beer cans!
I was thinking about old age and decided that it is 'when you still have something on the ball, but you are just too tired to bounce it'.
I thought about making a fitness movie, for folks my age, and call it "Pumping Rust."
I have gotten that dreaded furniture disease. That's when your chest is falling into your drawers!
I know, when people see a cat's litter box, they always say, "Oh, have you got a cat?" Just once I want to say, "No, it's for company!"
Employment application blanks always ask 'who is to be notified in case of an emergency' I think you should write, "A Good Doctor!"
Why do they put pictures of criminals up in the Post Office? What are we supposed to do -- write to these men? Why don't they just put their pictures on the postage stamps so the mailmen could look for them while they deliver the mail?
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Jack had no Jack.
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Posted:Aug 24, 2009 2:15 pm
Last Updated:May 23, 2024 5:12 pm
10930 Views
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Have to share this funny story about Jack with our blog friends. Think you will get a laugh from it, and you can harass Jack about it if you want. In fact I hope you will.
A few days ago Jack decided to go up north to the wilderness area with his buddies to fish and camp. I told him honey we have some friends coming over Saturday night. Jack told me, don't worry I will be back in time.
Off he went in our four wheeler with his buddies, and their fishing and camping gear. All went well until they begin their return home early on Friday morning. On the way back they got the bright idea to hill climb, which they did and boom they blew out a tire. No problem Jack had a spare.
He took out all the fishing and camping gear to get to his jack. Then Jack remembered he had no jack. He had taken it out and laid it aside in the garage making room for all the gear. So if he had a flat he didn’t have to take out the gear out to get to his jack. But Jack forgot to put his jack back in before they left.
Jack tried to call me at home on his cell, couldn’t get a signal, neither could his buddies. They were seven miles from civilization. Lady luck was with them though, after about two or three miles of walking, a couple of guys came along, but their jack wouldn’t work, so they gave them a ride to town, and Jack called and told me what happened.
Saturday morning my brother in law Ken, Star’s husband drove up to take the jack to Jack. The moral of the story is, if you go on a trip with Jack, make sure that Jack, has his jack, in case he has a flat, so you and Jack can make it back.
Hugs and kisses Amber.
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Boob Licking.
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Posted:Aug 15, 2009 10:12 am
Last Updated:Nov 17, 2015 11:55 am
12307 Views
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My very good Bi girlfriend rednkgrll and I, love to get with each other for some girl on girl play times. She is a real naughty hottie girl, and she has a naughty new swingers group. Jack and I are members with her group, and we love it. Click here to check her group out.  Idaho Swingers R Us. Hugs and kisses, Amber.
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Real answers given on California driving school exams.
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Posted:Aug 12, 2009 6:26 pm
Last Updated:May 23, 2024 5:12 pm
10433 Views
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These are real answers given on exams by The California Department of Transportation's driving school. I you not. JACK. 
Q Do you yield when a blind pedestrian is crossing the road?
A What for? He can't see my license plate.
Q Who has the right of way when four cars approach a four-way stop at
The same time?
A The pick up truck with the gun rack and the bumper sticker saying,
"Guns don't kill people. I do."
Q When driving through fog, what should you use?
A Your car.
Q What problems would you face if you were arrested for drunk driving?
A I'd probably lose my buzz a lot faster.
Q What changes would occur in your lifestyle if you could no longer drive lawfully?
A I would be forced to drive unlawfully.
Q What are some points to remember when passing or being passed?
A Make eye contact and wave "hello" if he/she is cute.
Q What is the difference between a flashing red traffic light and a flashing yellow traffic light?
A The color.
Q How do you deal with heavy traffic?
A Heavy psychedelics.
Q What can you do to help ease a heavy traffic problem?
A Carry loaded weapons.
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It's a guy thing for women.
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Posted:Aug 5, 2009 4:50 pm
Last Updated:May 23, 2024 5:12 pm
9987 Views
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These translations are for all of you wonderful women out there, so that you will know what us men really mean when we say the following. JACK
"IT'S A GUY THING"
Translated "There is no rational thought pattern connected with it, and you have no chance at all of making it logical."
"CAN I HELP WITH DINNER?"
Translated "Why isn't it already on the table?"
"UH HUH," "SURE, HONEY," OR "YES, DEAR"
Translated Absolutely nothing. It's a conditioned response.
"IT WOULD TAKE TOO LONG TO EXPLAIN"
Translated "I have no idea how it works."
"TAKE A BREAK, HONEY. YOU'RE WORKING TOO HARD."
Translated "I can't hear the game over the vacuum cleaner."
"THAT'S INTERESTING, DEAR."
Translated "Are you still talking?"
"YOU KNOW HOW BAD MY MEMORY IS."
Translated "I remember the theme song to 'F Troop,' the address of the first girl I ever kissed and the vehicle identification numbers of every car I've ever owned... but I forgot your birthday."
"OH, DON'T FUSS, I JUST CUT MYSELF. IT'S NO BIG DEAL."
Translated "I have actually severed a limb but will bleed to death before I admit that I'm hurt."
"HEY, I'VE GOT MY REASONS FOR WHAT I'M DOING."
Translated "And I sure hope I think of some pretty soon."
"I CAN'T FIND IT."
Translated "It didn't fall into my outstretched hands, so I'm completely clueless."
"WHAT DID I DO THIS TIME?"
Translated "What did you catch me at?"
"I'M NOT LOST. I KNOW EXACTLY WHERE WE ARE."
Translated "No one will ever see us alive again."
"WE SHARE THE HOUSEWORK."
Translated "I make the messes; she cleans them up."
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Funny Terms.
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Posted:Aug 5, 2009 3:51 pm
Last Updated:May 23, 2024 5:12 pm
9849 Views
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Sharing some funny terms with our friends. Hugs and kisses, Amber and Jack.
ADULT:
A person who has stopped growing at both ends and is now growing in the middle.
BEAUTY PARLOUR:
A place where women curl up and dye.
CANNIBAL:
Someone who is fed up with people.
CHICKENS:
The only animals you eat before they are born and after they are dead.
COMMITTEE:
A body that keeps minutes and wastes hours.
DUST:
Mud with the juice squeezed out.
EGOTIST:
Someone who is usually me-deep in conversation.
GOSSIP:
A person who will never tell a lie if the truth will do more damage.
HANDKERCHIEF:
Cold Storage.
INFLATION:
Cutting money in half without damaging the paper.
MYTH:
A female moth.
MOSQUITO:
An insect that makes you like flies better.
RAISIN:
Grape with a sunburn.
SECRET:
Something you tell to one person at a time.
SKELETON:
A bunch of bones with the person scraped off.
TOOTHACHE:
The pain that drives you to extraction.
TOMORROW:
One of the greatest labour saving devices of today.
YAWN:
An honest opinion openly expressed.
WRINKLES:
Something other people have. You have character lines.
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Cultural Differences Explained.
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Posted:Aug 4, 2009 9:05 am
Last Updated:May 23, 2024 5:12 pm
9964 Views
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Cultural Differences Explained.
Wanted to share this information with the group. Found it to be amusing and got a laugh myself from it. JACK.
Aussies: Dislike being mistaken for Pommies (Brits) when abroad.
Canadians: Are rather indignant about being mistaken for Americans when abroad.
Americans: Encourage being mistaken for Canadians when abroad.
Brits: Can't possibly be mistaken for anyone else when abroad.
Aussies: Believe you should look out for your mates.
Brits: Believe that you should look out for those people who belong to your club.
Americans: Believe that people should look out for & take care of themselves.
Canadians: Believe that that's the government's job.
Aussies: Are extremely patriotic to their beer.
Americans: Are flag-waving, anthem-singing, and obsessively patriotic to the point of blindness.
Canadians: Can't agree on the words to their anthem, when they can be bothered to sing them.
Brits: Do not sing at all but prefer a large brass band to perform the anthem.
Americans: Spend most of their lives glued to the idiot box.
Canadians: Don't, but only because they can't get more American channels.
Brits: Pay a tax just so they can watch four channels.
Aussies: Export all their crappy programs, which no-one there watches, to Britain, where everybody loves them.
Americans: Will jabber on incessantly about football, baseball, and basketball.
Brits: Will jabber on incessantly about cricket, soccer, and rugby.
Canadians: Will jabber on incessantly about hockey, hockey, hockey, hockey, and how they beat the Americans twice, playing baseball.
Aussies: Will jabber on incessantly about how they beat the Poms in every sport they play them in.
Americans: Spell words differently, but still call it "English".
Brits: Pronounce their words differently, but still call it "English".
Canadians: Spell like the Brits, pronounce like Americans.
Aussies: Add "G'day", "mate" and a heavy accent to everything they say in an attempt to get laid.
Brits: Shop at home and have goods imported because they live on an island.
Aussies: Shop at home and have goods imported because they live on an island.
Americans: Cross the southern border for cheap shopping, gas, & liquor in a backwards country.
Canadians: Cross the southern border for cheap shopping, gas, & liquor in a backwards country.
Americans: Drink weak, pissy-tasting beer.
Canadians: Drink strong, pissy-tasting beer.
Brits: Drink warm, beery-tasting piss.
Aussies: Drink anything with alcohol in it.
Americans: Seem to think that poverty & failure are morally suspect.
Canadians: Seem to believe that wealth and success are morally suspect.
Brits: Seem to believe that wealth, poverty, success and failure are inherited things.
Aussies: Seem to think that none of this matters after several beers.
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To link to this blog (amjaknbid) use [blog amjaknbid] in your messages.
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