The day after...
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Posted:Sep 9, 2018 7:15 pm
Last Updated:May 24, 2024 3:19 am
2274 Views
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So it's Sunday, football, laziness, lounging. Cleaning up the toys and whatnot from last nights party. It seems silly to keep a diary for myself outside of a blog. A blog can be read and followed, and as an exhibitionist, what good is a diary when a blog "puts it out there"?!
The pervy pissbiscuit I am is always seeking to put it out there without offending or freaking out the noncons. But I remember as a , starting around 13 years old, discovering just how mush I loved being naked outside. What an f'ing turn on. Add to that the possibility of being discovered and... maybe running into someone with a like mind. I never had that Adonis bod of a male dancer (or the face for that matter), but damn I came to spend a lot of time naked outside. I grew up 2 blocks from the Mississippi river, and spending a day at a river beach was the shit. I could spend an entire day, sunrise to sunset, naked, never seeing anyone else all day, and only occasionally seeing anyone at all. After doing that for years, I was conditioned to my pervy ways, and found ways to "accidentally" get seen but not seeing them, in strategic ways. Being outside is primal, natural, naughty. It still gets me tingly thinking about it. I can't tell you how many times as a young man I was watched (they thought I didn't know they were there) by women/girls through the leaves of bushed, plants, and trees, as I pleasured myself. Usually they just moved on without a sound, sometimes... rarely, they walked around "accidentally" to where I was to act shocked as they "accidentally" came upon me, naked, cock in hand, or just lying out naked in the sun, to get a closer look. And twice I was joined for fun.
Now I seek a play partner... or two... or more, friends with benefits, or a significant other would be perfect, to carry on that age old tradition. Whenever I have a subbie that is the first test of the level of her sluttiness, does she get hot being naked outside and exposing herself to me, or is she too freaked out by it, fearing something she has been assured I planned a contingency for. My first rule with a sub is do no harm. Legal shit has a way of skewing that in the wrong direction, so planning is required and always done. But as I add to this blog over time, it is a study into the doings of a DSM diagnosable ethical male sex addict, and my evolution, and continued exploration, that I seek to put into some semblance of understanding. I got into psychology to better understand myself and my own journey. My doctoral thesis will contain none of this, lest it fuck up the career. No, this is the compartmentalized shit throughout the years that only now I must share in this form to get it out there!
The next post will begin to tell about the earliest tingles of sexuality, before a boy even knows what it is, and how it developed into the sexual energy focused to find the community within which I can express myself now, and the journey. Read it, don't read it, believe it, don't believe it... this is for me.
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First blog post on Adult Dating zone... and so it begins...
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Posted:Sep 8, 2018 11:45 pm
Last Updated:Sep 13, 2018 3:05 pm
2752 Views
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Hello all.
I am goldwater69, a member of a fabulous kink community in the Twin Cities area. I have been a member of this community for 20+ years, and engaged the internet when it first came online through bbs and eventually specific sites. I have watched communities grow into the massive dynamic that it has become, here and everywhere, and it is constantly evolving as humans generally do, with everyone seeking their place in the world and hoping to find like-minded people with whom to connect and express.
Tonight I attended a play party in my community, one of any number going on at the same time, and at any given time (although usually on Saturday nights. Munches and other social events generally occur throughout the week in the evenings, but Saturdays are the night to fly your kink openly). At this particular dungeon one can witness a fabulous spectacle of people playing in a variety of different areas. For example, tonight there were violet want scenes, flogging scenes, a caning scene, punching scenes, a cell popping scene, and my favorite... a hanging scene! Yes, the noose and all. All safe, sane, and consensual, and moderated by "staff". Great food was available, and plenty to see, watch, and learn from.
As I connect with my "people" I am energized, and reminded that we are all seeking that connection that makes us whole, and through honesty, trust, and openness we can find that place we all lust for, whether it is as the bringer of the joy, or the receiver of the joy... or the voyeur of the joy! I am also reminded that ordinarily, people are just too damn consumed by the power sex brings to the table, and I see that everywhere, even here, in a place of virtual anonymity, people are still afraid to bust out into the real world and engage themselves in the real demonstrations of their passions. So I encourage those reading and wanting to get wet in reality with others, or one other, to attend a munch, meet at a coffee shop, get to know someone you meet here online and if it feels right take it to the next level, and take a chance and show up for life, lest it pass you by.
Vulnerability is about showing up and being seen. It's tough to do that when we're terrified about what people might see or think. 'Be in' is all about passion. Life is short. There are so many interesting things we can do in our life, and I feel like if someone is just "kind of" showing up, it's not worth it for them or for us, but you MUST actually show up. Nothing is better than showing up once or twice a month (or more), acting like an ethical pervert for two or three or four hours with no judgements, and then going home. I mean, for fuck sake, I get to engage with old and newly made friends and do all of the things I always fantasized about throughout the years, and know that they are safe, I am safe, and we are getting it on, not just wishing it were.
“Fantasy is hardly an escape from reality. It's a way of understanding it.”
― Lloyd Alexander
It's so strange how life works: You want something and you wait and wait and feel like it's taking forever to come. Then it happens and it's over and all you want to do is curl back up in that moment before things changed. That's after getting home from an event in a nutshell!
So get out and make it happen. It's right here, parsed from the bullshit profiles and posers. Make your fucking reality something of legend, and not just in your mind.
Play!
I will have more stories about scenes, people (not named), places, and everything sex/kink related taken from experiences first hand. I encourage your questions and feedback, and appreciate your following.
Carpe Diem Bitches!!!
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To link to this blog (goldwater694fun) use [blog goldwater694fun] in your messages.
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